|
Written by Will
|
|
Sunday, 11 May 2008 |
It's a dilemma everyone faces from time to time: How much space should you be giving your significant other? And when is it time to draw the lines? I think it's a compliment for others to admire or even desire to be with your girl. It'll make her want to stay healthy, sociable, and look her best. An escape from complacency! The same principle applies for guys. So don't be so over-protective. It communicates a lack of confidence and a fear of losing control.
Don't get me wrong, it's good to be protective at times. It show's that you care. Just not every time they happen to check them out. That's childish. Friendly flirting here and there is fine. But never give anyone the idea that they may be able to break up your relationship. It lowers your value, makes you look easy, susceptible to manipulation, and expresses that your partner is just not good enough. If you are seriously interested in alternatives, you should end your relationship first. Or discuss with your partner about keeping each other's options open.
The more we invest into a relationship, the more committed we become. Why? We measure worth and value based on how much they cost us. Whether it be monetary, time, or emotional pay off. A soft drink is worth $1 because it costs us $1. Diamonds, regardless of how plentiful they are, are valuable because of how much we are charged for them. So the more we buy stuff for our significant other, the more time we spend with them, and the more emotions mixed into the equation - the more difficult it becomes to leave them.
If you want to keep a girl forever, make them do all of the above. They'll stay with you as long as you remain attractive. Vice versa. But what causes attraction? Attraction = Value, Attainability, and Compliance. Value is any quality or characteristic that makes something or someone desirable. Attainability is the capability or probability of enriching one's life with that value. Compliance is the belief that a majority of requirements will be or has been met by those values. If you want to lose the girl, redefine what you find to be attractive. And continue to reinforce those new beliefs.
 |
